Man #24, The Actual Date

17 02 2012

I apologize that it has taken me so long to recap my date with Man #24, but I felt I needed to give you the back story about how we got set up and how I was getting pressure from my friends for this to, not only be a good matchup, but to also provide good material for a romantic comedy. (Hence Man #24’s tag – The Leading Man.)

To be honest, I anticipated that The Leading Man and I would have a good date. The friends who set us up happen to be very intuitive about these kinds of things, and I usually trust their judgment. Like I said, however, I was extremely nervous. The last time I had seen Man #24 had been before I had gotten married, started feeling depressed and trapped, and started drowning myself in emotion-deadening amounts of food and red wine. Therefore, he was not going to see the thin, sexy woman to whom he had last spoken. He might not even recognize me.

Oh dear god.

When we set up our date, The Leading Man said he was willing to meet me somewhere near my neighborhood, and I appreciated this a lot. If you’ve been reading this blog for any length of time, you know I have strong feelings about the things guys can do to make themselves look considerate from the very beginning, and offering to meet a woman on her turf is just one of them. By this, Ladies, I do not mean meeting a man at your house. (Geez, that would be scary.) What I mean is, if a man lives a half an hour away, he should not expect a woman to drive out to see him sight unseen. I’m okay with meeting a man halfway between his place and mine, but it’s always appreciated if he will make the extra effort to allow me to stay in neighborhoods in which I feel comfortable.

Sorry, guys. Maybe this doesn’t seem fair. But, your gender isn’t the one getting raped every 60 seconds in this country, so I don’t want to hear any whining and this is not something on which I’m willing to compromise.

Anyway, sorry for that tangent/soap box moment, but I just wanted to say how pleased I was that The Leading Man was willing to let me pick our rendezvous point without any pressure.

He mentioned that he was hungry for Thai food, and I was trying to think of a good Thai restaurant that had the right “first date” vibe somewhere in the U District. Unfortunately, there is a plethora of Thai restaurants in the area, but none of them have the kind of ambience I thought was comfortable for a first date/two people catching up after a long time kind of date. Most of them have these little, vinyl kitchen chairs to sit on, and I felt we really needed a booth. After himming and hahhing for a couple of seconds, I asked him if he would be willing to forego Thai in exchange for meeting at Schultzy’s instead. (Yes, I realize this is my third date in 24 that has been at Schultzy’s.)

He went for it, but then I felt bad for bulldozing his Thai food desires.

Although he said it was fine, I was conscious of what I had just done and felt I was not off on a good foot.

On the night of the date, I put on some dark-washed jeans, a brown top with three-quarter length sleeves, cute leopard spotted shoes, turquoise, brown, and gold necklace and bracelet, and gold earrings and headed out the door. Again, if you’ve been reading from the beginning, you may have noticed that I’m less anxious about sucking everything in these days. LONG gone are the Spanx! I still care about my appearance, but I am no longer willing to wrestle with compressive undergarments when I am out on a date.

The Leading Man and I met and talked for a few hours over beers and fries about everything from our friends and their crazy ideas to dogs to the legalization of marijuana to Ken Griffey Jr and beyond. The conversation was really fun and easy and I enjoyed it a lot.

At the end of the date, The Leading Man walked me to my car, gave me a kiss on the cheek and a hug and said we should definitely go out again. I said, “Well, next Saturday I’m invited to a party where everyone who comes has to perform a talent. You’re welcome to join me.”

He passed.

I admit; that would be a lot of pressure…

… but maybe we can go have Thai food.


Fabulously Fit Friday

26 08 2011

Weight Loss Weigh-in Wednesdays are going through a bit of an overhaul. After some feedback from readers, it is apparent that they want me to do more dating and less reflecting on my weight loss efforts. I have decided I will not write about my efforts at the gym every single week.  This is a DATING blog after all. Although getting back to my dating weight is important due to the inverse relationship between my weight and the number of men who will want to date me, it is merely an additional step, along with many others I am taking this year, in my journey to renew, rediscover, and reinvent myself.

That said, here are my thoughts regarding the status of my workouts.

I remain committed in spite of the fact that my weight loss seems excruciatingly slow. I’m still getting out of bed at the crack of dawn so I can get to Experience Fitness, get my workout in, shower and change at the gym, and rush off to work. The results, although slow, are becoming more and more apparent to me. I can walk longer and faster than I could a few months ago.  I’m lifting heavier and heavier weights.  My balance is improving.

Oh, and I’m not whining quite so much as I was in the beginning.

The truth is; I probably have not been the easiest client to train.  When I started, my bad knees limited what I could do. I had a bicycle accident that wiped out my left knee and a snowboarding accident that damaged my right.  My personal trainer, Zach has spent a lot of our time together having me do exercises that will help me stabilize me knees, and now I am finally getting strong enough to move on to heavier leg work.  Hopefully, now that I’m doing more leg work it will help increase my metabolism and help with the weight loss.

Then there’s the work to strengthen my abs. Zach, knows that I hate all exercises done on the stability ball.  Every time he rolls that thing out, I just know he’s trying to piss me off.  He claims he’s trying to help me strengthen my core, but I feel like he’s just trying to torture me.

So this week, he’s been away from Experience Fitness, and I’ve had a substitute trainer.  Before he left, Zach wrote out my workouts, and guess what?  There were plenty of stability ball exercises.  Besides the fact that any exercise done on a stability ball feels twice as hard as the same exercise done on a stable object, like a weight bench, one of the other reasons I hate the ball is because there is no graceful way to get on and off of one.

Ok, so the sit-up with medicine ball reach that I had to do this morning was not so bad.  The reverse hyper-extensions, however, are a whole different matter. For the hypers, you have to lie on the ball on your stomach, and then raise and lower your legs.  If you’re tall and overweight, like I am, getting down to place your stomach on the ball can be a bit of a challenge.  Picture a belly flop with control.

Think about that for a second.

I always feel bad when my stomach hits the ball and it gives a little bounce.  The other option, which I prefer when I am already on the floor, transitioning from the mat to the ball, is to kneel on my knees, place my upper body on the ball, and roll forward.  This seems better in some way, but it still feels awkward.

Finally, there is the execution of the hyper-extension exercise itself.  It was not so bad when Zach was having me do this with my legs together and straight.  I felt sort of like a dolphin swimming. Now, however, to make things more difficult, he wants me to lift my legs up and out to the sides. Seriously? In public??? Are you fucking kidding me?

I just keep telling myself that someday, SOMEDAY, I’m going to have the nicest, most toned ass you have ever seen.

But my lewd behavior does not stop there. Oh no.

The next exercise I had to do today was something called hamstring 3’s. These were again done with the stability ball.  With the hamstring 3’s, I have to lie on my back on a mat, place my feet on the ball and lift my pelvis off of the mat. Next, I have to roll the ball in to bend my knees and pulse my pelvis in the air 10 times. Then, straighten my legs, lift my pelvis, and pulse for a count of ten, and finally, the piece de resistance, with my feet still on the ball, lift my pelvis off of the mat and roll the ball in and out by bending and straightening my legs ten more times.

Nothing with this much pelvis thrusting should be this difficult!

Finally, remember a couple of weekends ago when I went to see “In the Next Room – The Vibrator Play” with my girlfriends? Well, today, a friend of mine informed me that this story is also a fancy pants British period drama.  (I need to go see this one too even though I know how it ends!) As you may recall, from my previous post, back in Victorian times, vibrators were used to cure “female hysteria” which encompassed a wide variety of symptoms…

Faintness, nervousness, insomnia, fluid retention, heaviness in abdomen, muscle spasm, shortness of breath, irritability, loss of appetite for food or sex, and “a tendency to cause trouble“.

Now, I don’t know if I’m hysterical or not, but I do know a cure for what ails me, and, with all of the exercises I’ve been doing at the gym, when I finally start dating a man with whom I’m interested in having sex…

…I’ll be prepared.

Weight Loss Weigh-in Wednesday #7

3 08 2011

I lost a pound this week.  242.  Woo hoo! Celebrate my little success with me, please.  A round of meal replacement shakes for everyone!! 


This is slow going. There’s no “Biggest Loser” excitement here, no gimmicks, no 12 pound per week losses, but I am sticking with it, getting stronger and staying focused.  You should see my biceps. Arm wrestling anyone?

I don’t think I would feel right now if I didn’t get my workouts in during the week.  Zach and the staff at Experience Fitness have definitely become part of my routine.

I also had a blogging first this week.

On Monday, when I was at Experience Fitness for my personal training session, I was standing at the front counter after my workout, filling out my cardio log, and talking to Zach.  A young woman approached me from the side, and hesitantly said, “Oh, my god, are you the blogger?”


“I found your blog through the gym’s website, and it is so good.  I’m supposed to be working and I’m reading your blog instead. It’s so good.  You’re famous.”

She was sort of gushing and I was sort of blushing. 

“Thank you,” I said smiling.  My friends have told me they enjoy my writing and I’ve had comments here on the blog, but this was the first time a complete stranger approached me and told me they were enjoying my stories.  It was pretty flattering, although it totally caught me off-guard.

The woman introduced herself and we spoke briefly about the blog.  She said she recalled from the blog that I was working out in the mornings with Zach, but she seemed surprised to actually see me there.  It was really cool to feel the energy of someone who was so enthusiastic about my writing.  Zach briefly got caught up in the dialogue too.

“Zach is going to be famous too,” I said, trying to divert some of the attention away from myself, “you know, he and Thor are the only individuals where I use their real names.”

“Oh, that’s nice,” Zach said as he was walking away.  I think he was blushing too.  (I had asked him when we started training for permission to use his real name. So, don’t worry; he knows he’s part of a blog.)

As I walked home I wondered if I had seemed friendly and open.  I hoped so.  You never know how your responses will sound to a stranger when you’re caught off guard like that.  Then I started thinking, most of the time I’m so sarcastic in this blog, why would anyone expect me to be nice???

But, I AM nice.  I really am.  And, I hope I’m perceived that way (at least most of the time.)

Coming soon:  Apricots and Misdemeanors, and Man #19, Thor’s Buddy.

Also, My Dating Prescription now has its own Facebook page.  Go LIKE it, please, and share it with your friends.

Weight Loss Weigh-in Wednesday #6

29 07 2011

Yes, I do realize that it’s Friday.

I figure I need to get back in this blogging game at some point, and I want to keep certain things consistent around here.  Plus, Weight Loss Weigh-in Wednesday just seems to sound so much better than Fighting My Fat Friday.

That would get your attention though, wouldn’t it?

Sad to say, there has been no weight lost on this weigh-in Wednesday.  The stress of the past two weeks may have something to do with it. (Plus the fact that my aunt seems to have an afternoon ice cream habit and she likes to have an accomplice.) 

I can proudly say, however, that while I was in Eastern Washington, I went for a hike 6 out of the 8 days that I was there. Hiking in Eastern Washington is definitely different from hiking in Western Washington.  I’m used to the sheltering canopies of conifers and moisture, not sand dunes.  I made sure I was up and out by 7 a.m. everyday in hopes of getting my hike in and getting back to my aunt and uncle’s air-conditioned digs before the heat really kicked in.  Plus, instead of worrying about cougars and bears, I had to watch out for coyotes and rattlesnakes.  Luckily, all I saw was a jack rabbit, coyote poo, some quail, and LOTS and LOTS of sage brush.

I started my personal training with Zach back up this week.  It was good to get back in the gym, and now he’s switching things up on me a little.  We’re moving from exercises that emphasis strength and balance to exercises that will be faster and provide a more cardiovascular emphasis.  For example, he made me do mountain climbers today, which seemed to make every ounce of fat on my body jiggle. Also, instead of regular shoulder presses, he gave me a lighter weight and had me press them alternately and faster.  He also threw a new core exercise at me, which I hate.  I know it will be good for me, but ab exercises are the worst.  It could have something to do with the fact that most of the weight I carry now seems to be in my stomach and my ass.

Zach always demonstrates the exercises for me before I have to do them. So, this morning, he got down on the mat and showed me how I was supposed to sit up on my butt, feet raised, torso raised, medicine ball in hands, and take the ball from side to side twenty times while keeping my feet and torso up.

“Oh, this is going to suck,” I said.

He dropped his head, smiled, and laughed, and said, “You can’t hate every exercise.”

“No just the hard ones.”

You would think that, at some point, one’s ass could become large enough to provide a nice stable base, like a blob of Silly Putty slapped down on a table to make the bottom flat, but no such luck.  My ass was not stable at all, but somehow, I managed to do three sets.  It wasn’t pretty though, let me tell you.  There were some pretty unattractive grunting sounds coming out of me. I didn’t let any “f” bombs fly though; it was too early in the morning for that.

One of my friends stopped by to buy fresh eggs this morning, (my chicken’s eggs, not mine,) and commented on how toned my arms are getting.  I briefly gave him a gun show.  The weight loss may be slow, but I’m still seeing things get redistributed.  I’ll discuss back fat versus lats at a later time.

Anyway, I’m back at it.  I have a couple more posts in the hopper and will try to work on them this weekend.

By the way, one of my subscribers asked me last time I posted about my weight loss whether the toes in the picture above were mine.  For the record, these are not my toes. Judging from their appearance, I would say these are the toes of a man. Don’t ask me how I know, I just feel like I know. You know??  In case you are wondering, my feet are, unlike the rest of me, relatively slender; my toes are painted; and, I have a toe ring.

Have a great weekend!  It looks like Julember in Seattle may finally be over.

Weight Loss Weigh-in Wednesday #4

6 07 2011

Today I weight 243. That’s a two-pound weigh loss since last week. The numbers on the scale aren’t moving very fast, but I am starting to see changes in the mirror. While I still have my belly, I’m going from looking approximately 7 months pregnant to about 6. The tale of the tape will happen when Zach, my personal trainer at Experience Fitness, changes my workout in a few weeks.  He has warned me that as soon as my body gets used to doing the workouts that we’re doing now, he will switch things up and make things more difficult.

That’s what personal trainers are for, I guess.  He really pushes me.  He’s not a drill sergeant, which is good, but he’s always pushing.  I’m up to pressing 30 pound dumbbells on the chest press and lifting 90 pounds on the lat pulldown. Basically, I’m back to lifting the kind of weights I did when I was in my twenties.

If I was trying to lose weight and get strong on my own, I probably wouldn’t even be making it out of bed to work out in the morning.  The accountability factor is huge.  I would feel like a shit if I missed an appointment, so I’m lacing up my tennis shoes at 6 in the morning and taking the 20 minute walk (one-way) up this huge hill to get to the gym.  Sometimes I have to hit the snooze a couple of times, but I always make it.  The payoff, of course, is that I’m starting to see measurable results in strength, endurance, and in how my clothes fit.

Last night, a friend of mine commented that I was looking thinner through my hips.  We were out at a Central District dive bar celebrating the fact that my friend, Marcy, had just been promoted to purple belt in Kung Fu. (Honestly, watching her test really made me want to go kick something.)  This outing was not good for my diet, because I ended up having two beers, (that’s four drinks already this week) with tater tots and nachos for dinner.  It’s not quite as bad as it sounds. The nachos and tots were shared between my three friends and I, but it’s certainly not the high-fiber lean protein my nutritionist would like me to be eating.

Starting the week with a party holiday is not easy.

Today is another day, and I will be good. I promise.

Today is, in fact, my anniversary.  Yes, I’m still married to that selfish f&%$er.  He had the audacity to send me a text message on Sunday asking if I would want to go have lunch with him. I was en route to Dora’s birthday party, so I told him I was already having lunch.  In response, he sent another text, “Want to do shots tonight?”

What an ignorant dick. I didn’t even answer.

I have already heard from him today, of course.  He wanted to know if I would want to go have dinner, and invited me to one of my favorite crepe restaurants in the city.  Damn it! He knows me.

I sent a text back, “To celebrate our anniversary???”

“We don’t have to if you don’t want. I just wanted to say thank you for being incredible and many other things.”

Yes, so incredible he needs a divorce.  I have another birthday party to go to tonight, so I will NOT be dining with my STB-ex.  Morbid curiosity has me wondering what he really wants, but something tells me sitting through dinner with him would not be worth it to find out.

Surprisingly, I’m not really that sad today. I think the 4th of July was harder for me than today.  The first year my husband was in the U.S. and two days before our wedding, we went to watch the fireworks at Gasworks Park.  His enthusiasm and the way he had been taking pictures and sending them to his parents in Colombia made me realize how much we take for granted in this country. It had actually made me cry.  This year, as I watched the fireworks, even though I was surrounded by friends, I found myself recalling that time, and it made me a little sad.

But now, I’d just like to get strong at Experience Fitness, maybe learn a little Kung Fu, and go kick him.

Weight Loss Weigh-in Wednesday #3

29 06 2011

Can I just say it? I was kicking ASS at the gym today! 

I’m definitely getting stronger.  I watched as my personal trainer, Zach, set the tricep pulldowns on 75 pounds.

“That looks heavy,” I said.

“That’s because you’re strong.”

Hell yeah!  I knocked them out, three sets, no problem.  I figure my legs are strong because they’ve been hauling my big ass around, but the amount of upper body strength that I have is a little surprising.

Then I think about it.  It’s Thor.  There’s nothing like playing tug-o-war with a pit bull to give you a strong back and arms.

Then, down on the mat, Zach had me do Dead Bugs.  They’re this abdominal exercise where your arms and legs are moving forward and back at the same time, like a dying bug.

“Have you noticed anything about these?” Zach asked.

“No, what?”

“When we first started doing these, you kept your legs really bent.  Now, your legs are almost straight.”

“They’re getting easier.”

It’s sort of funny. Between sets, I’m always telling Zach stories.  (It’s what I do. I can’t help it.)  It definitely makes the workout go by faster.  I think he can tell when he’s hit the right weight for me though, because when the exercise is challenging, I have to shut up, concentrate, and breathe.

This week was a good week. Even though my allergies have been kicking my ass for the past four days, causing me to be short of breath, I’m feeling a lot stronger.  I’m also starting to see indentations and curves happening in my arms where my biceps and triceps are supposed to be.  I’m still fat, but at least my fat is starting to take shape.

And guess what else happened? I got rid of those two pounds from last week. I’m at 245.

Weight Loss Weigh-in Wednesday #2

22 06 2011

Well, it seems the scale does not want to cooperate with my efforts this week. I was 247 when I weighed in this morning.  When I went to see Zach, my personal trainer at Experience Fitness, I asked him if he would also take my fat percentage measurement again.  My fat percentage was also up slightly at 40.2%.

This sucks. It used to be so easy for me to lose weight. Now my 43-year-old metabolism is definitely showing.

Zach spent a good deal of time today encouraging me to not concentrate on the numbers, but rather, to focus on how much stronger I’m getting, how my cardiovascular endurance is increasing, how my balance is improving, and how I’m feeling overall.  He said it is very common for a person’s weight to go up initially and the important part is to not get discouraged.  He also pointed out that a two pound weight gain is rather insignificant.  It could be due to a whole host of factors related to the regular fluctuations in a person’s fluid levels. 

In other words, I might just be bloated.

Anyway, I’m going to keep my spirits up.  In the meantime, I’m going to pay more attention to the diet part of this equation.  This also means that I need to rethink my dates.  My nutritionist told me I could have one glass of wine per week.  That means that if a date wants to go out for drinks I will need to nurse my one drink through the whole thing.  I’ll also need to try to steer dates toward more non-food related activities. This may actually end up being a good thing, and maybe it will result in more creative date ideas.

Besides, there are only so many Happy Hours a girl can go to before it starts to become a little dull.

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